Smalls is One Lucky Duck

Smalls is only 19 weeks and the size of a large heirloom tomato, but one thing is clear - Smalls is one lucky baby. We've already been given so many special gifts already... here's a sampling:

(Super squishy soft activity center)(Frenchie little lovey with snail)(A little reminder of our Northern California days...)(A spoon that stores the baby food then squeezes it onto the spoon.. genius!)(Custom-made Dixon, IL onesie!)
(Snuggly flannel blanket - I wish it was in my size!)
(Hooded towel... perfect for bathtime!)

We are lucky, lucky moms and it feels so amazing to have so many people who have already made our baby so welcome into this world! Thank you!

And now we nest.

I never understood the word "nesting." You know, people throw it around all the time like everyone should know what it means. Nesting blocks, nesting mothers. I never understood. Now, I understand.

For the past three weeks, Liz and I have been nesting like fools (not quite like the insane birds in our tree outside our window, but pretty close. Not as loudly or as early in the morning.). This nesting has included:

• Two trips to IKEA
• Two Craigslist purchases
• One trip to Loews
• One overflowing garbage can
• One trip to the reupholsterer
• Three bags full of clothes to donate to goodwill
• Several nervous breakdowns
• Countless hours spend internet searching

The exciting part is that the fruits of our labor are beginning to show. Oh, yeah, that Smalls fruit is starting to show, too, but I was talking about the nursery.

Since we decided that we would stick with the bright green (Shrek green) that Dana so lovingly painted about 3 years ago. I mean, the guy basically used a watercolor brush to get that paint as perfect as possible. (Sometimes I worry that it may have some impacts on his sight later in life - I mean, the color is really bright - and I wouldn't want to take that for granted.) We just wanted to add black and white and have a color instead of a theme baby room. Like, it's not animals, robots, trains...it's green, black and white.

So, this weekend was the first time that we started to assemble things in the nursery instead of just dumping things up there like some sort of baby fairy is going to clean it up. And man, I am EXCITED about the progress we made. The beginning started a little rough. The IKEA directions showed the picture of a man with a rumpled mouth because he had questions about what's in the box. But we weren't scared, because we are true experts at putting together furniture. It all started back in '04 with putting together the sideboard with Erin.

Soon, though we were into it. Railings were already in place, and all we really needed to do was slap the pieces together. No need for rumpled face after all!

All of the animals helped us put together the crib...especially Sully. Now, he thinks it is his bed for sure.

With the crib finished, the room is actually starting to look like a real nursery! We think that our $99 crib from IKEA (of course, approved by Consumer Reports...I told you, countless hours doing research) looks pretty good! Next stop, ohdeehoh!

The first of Liz's crib sheets she is making is finished. We've bought several black, white, and green fabrics and found a great pattern to make crib sheets. The first one is hippo fabric from IKEA...I think that she did a fabulous job.

And then is our first Craigslist find, a black and white table for next to the glider (which we dropped off at the reupholsterer on Friday). I think that it is adorable and I love the $6 Ikea Light on top of it! Smalls and I are going to have some great times next to that table. Late, great times.

Before we collapsed, we put some of Smalls' stuff up on the shelves. Can you believe how many books Smalls has already? I know, you can hardly tell that one of Smalls' moms is a teacher.

More pictures to come soon, in the next episode of As the Mommies Nest.

The Nose Knows

We have had a major turn of events - Liz's sense of smell has developed a life of its own. I have heard before about the heightened sense of smell that many women develop when they are pregnant, and, like pickles and ice cream, I always thought that it was a myth. That is, until now that I have my very own pregnant woman.

Yesterday, our neighbor was grilling outside, and Liz couldn't stop talking about how it smelled like fish. Important note: it didn't really smell like fish. I couldn't even tell that it was fish at all.

This morning, Liz decided that our house smelled bad. "The whole house?" I asked. "Yuppers," she said. "The whole house." It didn't.

Liz is now like a bloodhound. My very own bloodhoud that will sniff out barbequed fish or regular house smells from a mile away.

Fruit? Is that all you've got?

I know that babies grow at a very fast pace, and it is all the rage for pregnant ladies and their partners to follow their baby "week by week." We, of course, always trying to be on the edge of what is fashionable for pregnant ladies, have signed up for these week-by-week emails from babycenter.com. We look forward to getting the email every week and learning what should be going on -- how E can expect to be feeling, different quizzes we can take, naming suggestions for Smalls, all that fun stuff.

What I can't understand is the weekly update on the size of the Smalls. It is amazing to me the details that they know about Smalls' development, so why can't they find something better to compare Smalls to than small fruits, legumes, and nuts? This produce aisle extravaganza started in week 4!

Week 4: Poppyseed. Really, like the size of those annoying things that get stuck in my teeth? C'mon.
Week 5: Seasame seed. I was hungry for bagels this whole week.
Week 6: Lentil. Just one lentil? Like A lentil in the soup?
Week 7: Blueberry. I want to know what happened to lima bean. Where's lima?
Week 8: Kidney bean. Phew.
Week 9: Grape. Green, red, globe? Who knows.
Week 10: Kumquat. We've moved into exotic fruit now. And I always thought that a kumquat and a grape were the same size.

I wonder if this is where they get they saying that giving birth is like trying to push out a watermelon. Do you think by the end of this fruit salad we'll arrive at watermelon?

We've got a wiggler!

So, Smalls is a wiggler. We had our very first ultra sound today, and Smalls moved around so much that it was hard to get a picture of her!! I thought that wasn't supposed to happen until much later, but obviously, Smalls is active.

I am not sure if E has told you where the name Smalls came from, so I wanted to test my best multi-media skills and post a video for you. Keep in mind, this was all Liz -- and yes, she regularly quotes the movie "The Sandlot."



We are so excited to begin the next part of our lives together. I can't believe it is real!!

Smalls First Picture!

Today was our first prenatal appointment today and we were SO surprised that we would get an ultrasound! We were expecting to get to hear the heartbeat (which did not happen) but it was way more exciting to get to see Smalls on the screen! Our nurse practitioner saw the heart beating (though neither TOM nor I could make it out) at 160 beats per minute (just right!). Smalls was wiggling all around but I can't feel it just yet.

Everything else from the appointment went well. My official due date is Feb. 27 and my next appointment (with the OB) is in 4 weeks.

It's REALLY real now!!!!!

No Growing, No Knowing

I'm 8 weeks in, but I haven't officially started growing yet. Well, my belly, anyway. My boobs... they've been INSANELY SORE and have grown to the point where I'll soon need a new bra and any non-stretchy shirts no longer fit. My belly, well, it's getting kind of bloated, but no real "growth" yet. I'll probably need to wait another month or so before that starts happening. I've been super lucky to not have terrible morning sickness, but that doesn't mean I haven't been nauseous and been TOTALLY adverse to some foods (melty, gooey cheese? BLECH!). I've managed to gain 5 lbs already (I'm dreading what the Dr. will have to say about that), but all but one pair of pants are still fitting just fine. I did buy a "Bella Band" which is basically a giant stretchy band that allows me to cruise around with my pants unbuttoned without them falling off (awe-some).

I guess the lack of being able to "tell" just by looking at me is good, however, because we still have only shared our news with our closest of friends. I'm really dying to tell, but I know we're not out of the woods yet and my first appt isn't for two more weeks. We're hoping we'll get to hear the heartbeat and get an update that all is well. Until then, we're in the ignorance is bliss stage and just hoping that all these symptoms I'm having are proof enough. The fatigue is getting somewhat better, though I did fall asleep at work the other day for 30 minutes. Good thing no one noticed!

So for now, it's you and me, blog.

Hole in One! (or "One in the Hole")

This couldn't be happening because we're just not that lucky. The FIRST insemination attempt worked. I had myself all prepared for three, four, five, six attempts. I told myself that this first time was just a practice run. I wasn't going to get excited. TOM and I reminded ourselves over and over again that we weren't going to get excited because it wasn't going to work .... except it did.

I'm normally not into the whole getting in touch with my feelings thing, but after that insem, I went back to work and while I was sitting there at my desk checking my email, I just knew it had worked. I mean at that point, I'm sure nothing had actually happened, but I just felt it. When I got home from work that evening, I told TOM "there's a baby in there." She was kinda mad. "It's not going to work this time! I thought we agreed that we weren't going to get our hopes up." She was right. But I still knew.

So fast forward to a week and a half later, 10 days past ovulation. The VERY earliest one could test. I happened to find a bargain on pregnancy tests, so I figured the WORST thing about using one of those bad boys up was that it would tell me I wasn't pregnant, in which case I would just test again in a day or two. It was the Clearblue digital kind (and that part is key... remember that for later). I peed. I set it on the counter. I put a piece of tp over the window so I couldn't look until the three minutes were up. TOM came over and like a magician revealing a rabbit, I pulled the sheet away from the window and it said.... pregnant. Not not pregnant. Pregnant. There was freaking out. There were tears. There was jumping. There were phone calls to parents and siblings.

But neither TOM nor I are satisified with ONE test. No, not us. We need data. We need statistics. We need something that cooroborates the story. So I waited 30 minutes and peed again and..... NOT pregnant. There were more tears. There was not jumping.

By the next morning, three more tests all confirmed it... NOT pregnant. Many internet searches later revealed that the Clearblue Digital is notorious for false positives. Awesome. (Do I need to tell anyone who's testing NOT to ever use this test?!?!). Fortunately the ladies over at the IVP talked me down off the ledge, reminded me I still was a few days out from expected period date, and advised me to step away from the digitals.

Armed with the trusty pink-lined sticks, I tried again on day 12 and.... faaaaaaint positive line. So was maybe a little bit pregnant. Day 13, slightly darker line, but not dark. And then day 14, the day I should've had my period... see exhibit A above. THAT was the sign I needed!!!!!!!

So all of this is to say, we're pregnant!!!

But you, loyal reader of our blog, probably already knew that. We've only shared this with a select few of you, just as we're only sharing with our happy news with a select few of you. So no posting on our facebook pages, telling other friends, or....whatever. But we knew we could trust you, right?

On with the stroller selection! Oh wait. We already did that.

TWW (That's Two Week Wait, to you)

Ok, today we've officially moved from "just planning to inseminate" to "actually inseminating." Wow. This morning was our first IUI and though I really tried to keep calm, I found myself awake at 3:30 am, anxious as all get-out. It turned out that I just got whomever was on duty and it happened to be a male doctor. I wanted to panic, since no man has ever been up in there, but I knew that panicking wouldn't help at all. When he walked in the door with the vial, he asked me to hold it and keep it warm. All I could think about was "this tiny vial of pink(?) stuff cost $300. Panicking about the male doctor will just ensure that you're wasting $300. Don't do it."

But I made it. And now I'm sitting here reading posts on my "lesbians trying to conceive" forum, especially the ones about how days 10 and 11 are the hardest and I'm thinking, "oh crap. It gets HARDER than today?" I can't tell you how many times I typed "earliest signs of pregnancy" into the google. I really don't know how I'm going to make two weeks. I've told myself over and over that it isn't going to work the first time, but OF COURSE I want it to. Ugh. What have I gotten myself into?!?!?

Big Day #1

So tomorrow is the big day... the day we go in for our first insemination. It feel like it should be a secret, but all of you that read this blog already know, so I guess it isn't too big of a secret! I'm feeling kind of nervous and kind of excited, and kind of.... hmmm... I don't know. I'm trying not to get too worked up, though, because, as Erin said, my "uterus might suspect." It's true. I DO have a very suspicious uterus.

So the deal is that I was supposed to call by 1:30 today so they could wash the sample and get it all prepared for an 8:00 am appointment tomorrow. I needed to use an ovulation predictor kit to detect my LH surge, which is what triggers ovulation. I did one at work this morning (I have to pee on a stick) and it was negative... no surge! Thankfully, I was able to leave work and get home and try again (since I stupidly only brought sticks for a single round). Still.... negative. Agh! The clock was ticking and it was getting closer to 1:30. I drank some more water (ok, a lot of water) so I could pee again. This time, success! I finally got the little smiley face I'd been waiting for!!! Yay!

So.... we're good to go! Of course, I really want it to work, but I know that the odds are actually against me. I know that we're about to start something that could take more than a year of trying, so I keep reminding myself that this is just practice....

.... but I really hope it works.